Total Non-Stop Action presents Impact
Date: 1/26/2012
From: Orlando, FL

Tonight, Alex Shelley returns to action against Zema Ion. A new number one contender for the TNA Knockouts Championship is crowned and a tag team tables match is the main event!

The show starts off with Bully Ray and Jeff Hardy brawling backstage. Hardy is working on Ray with a broomstick. Ray is able to get a brief upper hand before missing an elbow drop. Bobby Roode appears in the parking lot and helps Ray beat up Hardy. Ray drops a wooden crate onto Hardy a few times. They decide to toss Hardy into the trunk of a truck when James Storm shows up and helps Hardy by fighting off both Roode and Ray. Storm is beaten up as well by Ray and Roode. Sting comes over and hits both Ray and Roode with a baseball bat before chasing them away. That was a different way to start the show, which I don’t mind.

Opening Contest: #1 Contenders Match
Velvet Sky vs. Tara vs. Mickie James
The winner of this match will meet Gail Kim at Against All Odds. Tara avoids a clothesline from James, who instead clotheslines Sky. Sky breaks up the pin by dropkicking James. Sky sends James to the floor but Tara rams her back first into the corner. James kicks Tara in the midsection and gets a two count on a roll up. This match really sucks already. Their timing is all off and they seem really slow to me. James hit a top rope Thez Press onto Sky but isn’t able to earn the win later on in contest. Sky prevents Sky from hitting a DDT on Tara by delivering a face buster. Tara slams Sky onto James and pins James to win the match.

Your Winner: Tara via pin fall
Match Rating: 1/2*

Sting, James Storm and Jeff Hardy make their way down to the ring. Sting calls out Bobby Roode and Bully Ray to come down to the ring. They appear through the crowd and we see a continuation of what happened earlier in the night. Sting gains order in the ring and tells them to calm down. Sting is going to let them all fight tonight on Impact. Tonight, there will be a tag team match! James Storm wants the match to be a tables match after a brief brawl. Sting asks the fans and he grants the match.

Backstage, Alex Shelley says once he beats Zema Ion tonight his eyes are on Austin Aries at Against All Odds.

Backstage, Eric Young is talking to an Impact worker but he thinks he is a musician. Angelina Love and Winter come over and begin to flirt with Young. Love suggests they do something other than fighting. Love tries to low blow Young but he was wearing a cup and she hurts her knee. ODB heads over and reminds him they have a tag match tonight.

Second Contest: Zema Ion vs. Alex Shelley
Shelley rolls Ion up early on but isn’t able to keep his shoulders down long enough. Shelley chops Ion after being shoved and kicks Ion in the back. Ion is begging Shelley to not him in the face while in the corner. Ion hits a twisting cross body from the middle rope for a two count. Shelley counters a head scissors by driving Ion face first into the mat and clotheslines Ion to the floor. Shelley misses a baseball slide and is dropped with a neck breaker by Ion back in the ring. Ion dropkicks Shelley to the floor but Shelley returns to knee lift and clothesline Ion before delivering a kick to the side of his head. Ion is sent face first into the middle turnbuckle but Shelley misses a double stomp off the top. Ion plants Shelley with a DDT before going up top where he misses the 450 splash. Shelley hits the Slice Bread and wins the match.

Your Winner: Alex Shelley via pin fall
Match Rating: ***

Backstage, AJ Styles is talking about how the business has changed Daniels and Kazarian but not himself. He says we are going to get to the bottom of what is going with Kazarian tonight!

Backstage, Tara says she is going to win the TNA Knockouts Championship and says she will do anything to win it just as Gail Kim will do whatever it takes to keep it.

Apparently, Eric Bischoff went to Garrett Bischoff’s training station. After a commercial break we go to that video. Eric doesn’t believe that anyone wants to train his son. Eric doesn’t allow the cameraman to see who the trainer is! It’s probably just Hogan.

Third Contest: Winter & Angelina Love vs. Eric Young & ODB 
I don’t care about this one, sorry folks. This gets a long story short treatment. I think that’s the first one of the 2012 year. ODB and Young deliver stereo airplane spins and ODB pins Love. This segment went nearly ten minutes. That was just not necessary.

Your Winners: Eric Young & ODB via pin fall

Backstage, Bully Ray is asking Bobby Roode when did James Storm grow a set of balls. Roode has now idea. They don’t understand why he would challenge Bully Ray to a tables match. Ray says that Roode isn’t the champion for long, but doesn’t elaborate on that. They can’t decide on who leaves the room but they leave at the same time. I’m thinking Bully is going to turn face soon.

A video promoting the issues between the teams of Morgan & Crimson and the team of Magnus & Samoa Joe.

Fourth Contest: TNA World Tag Team Champion Matt Morgan vs. Samoa Joe 
Joe kicks Morgan in the thigh before jabbing Morgan in the corner several times. Morgan fights back with right hands in the corner along with a chop to his chest. Morgan jumps on Joe’s back as he was backed up on the ropes. Morgan leg drops Joe across the apron as well. Joe gets a choke on Morgan in the corner but is rammed back first into the corner. Morgan elbows Joe a few times in the corner. Morgan clotheslines Joe for a two count only on the cover attempt. Joe leaps off the middle rope to hit a leg lariat. Joe kicks Morgan in he corner but isn’t able to put Morgan away. Morgan clotheslines Joe in the corner two times and drives Joe down with a side slam for a two count. Joe fights back with a senton splash but Morgan kicks out before three. Morgan hits a discus clothesline and that’s good enough for the win.

After the match, Magnus sends Crimson into the ring steps. Joe chop blocks Morgan’s leg and Magnus hits a middle rope elbow drop to leave the champions laid out.

Your Winner: Matt Morgan via pin fall
Match Rating: **1/2

Backstage, James Storm says they are going to beat Roode and Ray in their own game tonight. Jeff Hardy says they are going to finish off the show with a boom!

AJ Styles makes his way out to the ring to cut a promo. Styles talks about Kazarian costing him his match against Gunner and says he could care less about Kazarian. He wants to know why Christopher Daniels was telling Kazarian what to do, and wants to know why Kazarian was allowing it. That brings out Daniels and Kazarian. Kazarian tries to speak but Daniels ask for the microphone, which he gets. Daniels says that Styles usually complains on the microphone. He says that AJ complains as soon as there is an issue. Daniels says that Styles throws tantrums and they aren’t going to play that game. He says that Kazarian doesn’t owe Styles anything. Styles decides to fight Daniels but stops on the apron. Instead, Styles turns his back and will allow Kazarian to take his head off. Daniels wants him to do it. Kazarian gets to the apron but turns around. Daniels wants him to do it. Styles kicks Daniels to the floor! Styles doesn’t care what Kazarian is doing with Daniels. He wants Kazarian to shake his hand and they will move past their issues. Kazarian gets on the apron and enters the ring but Daniels gets on the microphone and tells Kazarian that he knows exactly why he isn’t going to do it. He demands Kazarian to leave the ring and he does. Daniels says he is going to propose a match for Against All Odds that will see AJ Styles wrestle Kazarian.

Main Event: Tables Match
Jeff Hardy & James Storm vs. TNA World Champion Bobby Roode & Bully Ray
All four men brawl on the floor with Storm going after Roode and Hardy working on Ray. Ray hammers way on Hardy and Roode turns the tables on Storm by ramming him into a table face first. Hardy counters a suplex attempt on the floor and punches Ray. He was nearly sent through a table. Storm spits beer into Roode’s eyes on the ramp way. Roode hits a snap suplex on the ramp on Storm. Ray slams Hardy on the floor as well. Ray is working on Storm with a chain but misses a shot. Storm fights back on both men and Hardy hits Roode with a clothesline to help his partner as we go to commercial.

Ray whacks Hardy over the back with a chair. Storm spits beer into Ray’s face and sends him into the guard railing face first. Hardy catapults Roode face first into the ring post. Hardy sets a table up in the ring. Ray pulls the table out of the way to save his partner from being slammed through it. Ray clotheslines Storm and Hardy. Storm saves Hardy from being backdropped through a table by moving the table. Hardy clotheslines Roode but Ray enters the ring and clotheslines Hardy. Ray misses a big boot attempt and his foot goes through the table. Storm nails Ray with the Code Breaker. Roode drives Storm down with a spine buster.

Roode brings another table into the ring while Ray yanks on Hardy’s hair on the floor and punches his head against the ring post. Roode attempts a superplex on Storm with Hardy on the table, but Hardy moves and Storm fights Roode off. Hardy hits the Twist of Fate on Roode! Roode is placed on the table and Storm gains footing on the top rope. Storm leaps off and elbow drops Roode through the table to win the match!

Your Winners: James Storm & Jeff Hardy
Match Rating: **1/4

After the match, Bully Ray attacks Storm’s left ankle with several chair shots and hits Hardy with the chair as well. Ray continues to beat down the winners of the match. Ray sets another table up and puts Hardy on the table. Ray wants to hit a power bomb off the middle rope. Roode gives Hardy to Ray who power bombs Hardy off the middle rope through a table! Roode gets his championship and holds it in the air to close the program.

Final Thoughts: 
I thought the show this week was okay. The match between Shelley/Ion, Morgan/Joe and the Main Event were all fine matches, in my opinion. The program started off slow but it picked up and held my interest. I’m still not sure what they are trying to do with the whole Styles/Daniels/Kazarian situation and really hope there is an angle there. If they drop it without any kind of finish to it I wouldn’t be surprised. Whatever Daniels is holding over Kazarian, it better be shocking. I’ll give this weeks episode a mild thumbs up. It seems like TNA has been putting on some fine television so far in 2012.

Thanks for reading.

The subject’s of Finn’s songs are similar to the Hold Steady material, except they’re more sad, tragic and without hope. The instrumentation is also a bit different than what we’re used to, trading in the bar-rock for flourishes of country, indie, and bluesy rock.

The inaugural track, “Apollo Bay” sets the listener up for the unique experience that Clear Heart offers; with it’s swampy-sound, Deliverance may have a new theme (damn I hate those banjos). “No Future” is recorded in much of the vein of the Hold Steady’s sound, but could have easily come from a Velvet Underground record. “Terrified Eyes” has two  middle-aged, scared to death, protagonist’s dealing with life the best way they can. “Rented Room” is a single man’s lament of a once fruitful relationship, and what else is there to do in a rented room, than to reminisce about it.

If there is anything that these hopeless songs deliver is that while in the moment they may bemoan threatening and disconsolate conditions, but together in a room with these songs and people to share it with, the future won’t be as bleak.

If we’re not blessed with a new Hold Steady album this year, Clear Heart will make a more than fine substitute, but still it’s more than that, it’s one of the best records of the year.

Rating:

4. Jason Jordan

Okay, so I did not make this one the match. I am not a fan of Abraham Washington. I have been tarnished since his days back in ECW. Where he is not an awful wrestler this is the man who hosted his own show while on ECW, every week mind you, and still has not grown with his mic skills. He faces off with the relatively new man on TV, Jason Jordan, who hails from Chicago, Illinois. My bias once again works in because as a girl who was uprooted from Chicago I love throwbacks to my home. That is not the only reason Jordan receives a nod, though. He is yet unpolished but has a certain determination that will prove later on he is someone to keep your eye on.

3. Raquel Diaz vs. Audrey Marie for the Divas Championship Title

I really struggled with putting Raquel Diaz at number three. She put on such an awesome display that not only earned her the Divas Championship Title but gave her an opportunity to show off her Gory Bomb that she should be higher on the list because of these two things. Alas, I wanted to stick with matches as much as I could and Audrey Marie just is not up to par on performances. Though I may not think Audrey Marie is as bad as say, my companions who watch FCW. In fact, I might put Audrey Marie at least in third on FCW. Raquel, though, is spectacular. She might yet not be perfectly polished but she still would have the majority of the WWE diva roster beat with her talent and mic skills. There is a reason she not only is the new Divas Champion of FCW, but also the Queen.

2. Grand Royale

The show starts off with Maxine and Normal Smiley announcing a Grand Royale, only the third in FCW history. For me, this was the first. A Grand Royale is where all of the men of the FCW roster (Eli Cottonwood sighting!) step back around the ring and have 30 seconds to get into the ring. At the end of the 30 seconds whoever is left standing in the ring gets to compete. Whoever was the winner of this particular match competed in the main event against Leo Kruger for the FCW Heavyweight Championship. The thirty second scramble was great and should be done more, but not too often! I will not give too many details because I really want people to watch this match, but I must reveal the winner:

1. Mike Dalton vs. Leo Kruger for the FCW Heavyweight Championship

When we first saw Mike Dalton, my boyfriend commented, “He’s the FCW jobber.” It quickly changed and he was winning matches. Then somehow had the best pants amongst them all. Then he was competing for the Title against Leo Kruger? Well, if that ain’t a bitch of a twist. And I loved it! Leo Kruger inevitably won but I could not look away from the screen during this. I always remind everyone when it comes to moves I know no names and do not pretend to understand every strike, but I know what looks good and what does not, and this match was flawless. So Flawless that Lay-Cool would have endorsed it. Dalton is not ready to be Champ yet, but his time may be coming. When it’s not against Kruger, I might even root for him.

Normally I would tell you the bad things about FCW at this point, but I pretty much explained those during the appraisal of the others. Instead I am going to whine about one, little, teeny, tiny thing that is bothering me. I WANT MY ASCENSION BACK!! GIVE ME ASCENSION!!

See, that wasn’t so bad.

What do I do if one of the guests on my new show accident rips ass? Breaks wind? Bakes a butt brownie? Crop dusts? Let’s loose a brown cloud? What do I do???

The UnFamous Chris Show returns to YouTube in February 2012. I’m going to put up teasers all throughout January so are you so very, very teased when the show finally debuts. Get ready for teasing.

Merv on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/pages/Merv/327626947278213

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Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/unfamouschris

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Enjoy!!!

Whether I want it or not, Quentin Quire is going to become the focus of this book.  Hero or villain, as I’ve said before, we’re not quite sure what’s going on in his mind.  He is cocky and arrogant to be damn sure, but he could be so much more in either the sides of angels or demons.

Quentin is like any kid and just wants to skip classes.  Unlike any other kid Quire has the mutant gift to pretty much rewrite reality within another’s mind.  He fools Wolverine and Armor to believe they are in another world, and keeps their memories of who they are and the real world, away from their avatars minds.

Its a 5 part limited series, and I’ve read comics long enough to know better than to give a review on part one of a five part limited (as in contained) series.  One issue of an ongoing?  Hell yeah I’m going to run my mouth on that one.  In theory though this one will have some sort of endgame.

Quentin fucks with the minds of people he shouldn’t and at the end of the issue Wolverine is awake.  In some way.  His mind may be unconscious and in the dream/fantasy world.  But that doesn’t negate the possibility of his animal side awakening and controlling his quest for freedom in the real world.

Somehow I went from not reading any mutant books for nearly 10 years to now buying two a month.  Seeing these well and long established characters knocked off their game by kids is a great twist on the larger idea of the X-Men.  These used to be the teen super heroes.  Well what happens when those teens grow up and a new generation comes along.  Chances are, those kids will be testing limits at a further distance than any of the original, uncanny or all new all different crew could even dream of.

Wolverine and the X-Men (in this book and in the ongoing) is Marvel’s Kingdom Come.

Quentin Quire uses his mutant powers to communicate with Krakoa the living island.  Krakoa then… joins the X-Men?! This is the most brilliant idea I’ve ever seen!

Seriously, a living island (or the offspring of) must have some sort of consciousness, beliefs, triumphs and tragedies.  It is not above the concepts of good and evil.  It seems easier to believe an outsider, like a living island, could be manipulated easier than a human.  Humans (and mutants) are taught from birth by society that you are important, you are an individual, and you matter.  Its a great ego stroke that helps many of us deal with the day to day bullshit of the world.

Living islands don’t have this benefit.  I’m guessing of course, I’ve never spoken to one.  Abused, beaten down, made to feel worthless.  Its no wonder that such a creature could be manipulated.  To see Krakoa turn face (wrestling terms in everyday conversations are fun!) is yet another original universe expanding idea in a book that has been full of them.  Add this to Iceman becoming one of the most powerful mutants on the planet.

Plus, I am only now dipping my toes back into the waters of the X-Men, but Quentin Quire is one of the most well rounded characters I’ve ever read.  I don’t know if I’m supposed to love or hate him yet, but this confusion means I’ll buy any comic book he’s in just to find out more.

And I didn’t even mention the big tease at the end.  (Find out on your own.  Too cool to spoil.)

Get on the best X-Men comic out there today.

The album’s opener, “Halo” sets the listener up for what they’ve been hoping for from McGraw, a downer record. However, what ensues is more of that old happy-go-lucky McGraw. And while Traffic is tantamount to his previous releases, it doesn’t mean that it’s not a good record. “Halo” itself shows McGraw going in a new direction musically, with a sound to make Coldplay look twice.

A cover of Dee Irvin’s R&B classic “One Part, Two Part” shows up here with backing vocals from wife Faith Hill, and is one of the albums strongest tracks. Many will recognize “Felt Good on My Lips,” the single released over a year and a half ago, and McGraw’s last No. 1. The album closes with the metaphorical wonder “Die by My Own Hand,” a Halfway to Hazard cover, creating a bookshelf effect with the album’s opening track.

Is this McGraw’s best album? No, but It’s his best in quite some time, at least since Live Like You Were Dying. McGraw has affirmed that another album will be released this year under a new record label, but until then, enjoy the “lost” album of Tim McGraw.

Rating:

American Idol fans will remember Brooke White from season 7 of the show, and while past success will lead to recognition and automatic success, with Jack and White it’s different. It’s pursued from an alternative route with lovely results. Teamed up with Jack Matranga, guitarist of the band Self Against City, and put together with a chemistry set we have Jack and White (no not Jack White, and if you don’t know who he is…ummm yeah just stop now).

“Night After Night” opens the record, and feels much like an Everly Brothers’ song or at least recorded in that particular tradition. “XYZ” is the EP’s best; a comforting song about growing up and life in general. It sounds like it could have come from Neko Case’s library, but with the Jack and White twist it’s all their own (and no it didn’t by the way.). And just when you think you can’t get enough of that lush guitar, it never ceases to warm you heart.

One can only wonder what a full length will sound like from these two, and hopefully that’s not far off in the future.

Rating:

Rick and the gang discover that there might be other groups.  Maybe even a civilization.

I had an idea while reading this issue.  Rick and crew are the heroes of this book only because we are following their story.  We see their motivations, reasons, monologues, thoughts, and any other word you want to throw in here to explain knowing what someone is thinking and why.  But if we were reading another story, the story of a group that encounters Rick and crew, we would see them as villains.  Take Jesus, from this issue.

Jesus tried to offer a trade to this group of people.  He got attacked and fought back.  Cheers if we’re following his story.  Then it seems like these people are about to accept his offer, but instead they knock him out and tie him up.  He comes with this great offer, and they attack him over it?!  These are villainous acts.  Then we get the bad guys point of view in which they say that if the heroes (in this scenario) don’t do things their way they will raid and kill their communities.

Yes, you have to protect yourself and your own.  I’m feeling that by issue 100 this may no longer be a book about someone to look up to, but someone to hate.

   Any CHIKARA fan who brings 3 paying guests with them to the event will be admitted ABSOLUTELY FREE! Our live event experience is without peer, and there’s no better way to share it than with friends! So round up three of yours and bring them to The Palmer Center on Saturday night, January 28th. Every fan that brings 3 paying customers with them, we’ll admit free to the event! If you already purchased your ticket to the event, and you end up bringing 3 fans with you, we’ll refund you the purchase price of your ticket!

   CHIKARA is your cure for boring pro-wrestling! Show your friends what all the buzz is about, and we’ll let you in for free! This offer is only being extended for our January 28th card in Easton PA!

   We’re bringing an action-packed card featuring all your CHIKARA favorites, the evening’s bouts will be:

~FORMER PARTNERS COLLIDE!~

Gran Akuma vs. Icarus

~MAT MASTERS MEET!~

Mike Quackenbush vs. Green Ant

~THE OSIRIAN PORTAL IMPLODES!~

Ophidian vs. Hieracon

~FIRST TIME EVER!~

Hallowicked vs. Archibald Peck

~TAG TEAM ACTION!~

3.0 vs. Tim Donst & Jakob Hammermeier

~ONE ON ONE!~

Jigsaw vs. Kobald

~POINTS UP FOR GRABS!~

Fire Ant & Soldier Ant vs. Obariyon & Kodama

~PLUS:~

-The arrival of Mr. Touchdown in CHIKARA!

-Prepare yourself for Quiz Present Crisis Battle!

-Your chance to get photographed in the ring with Dasher Hatfield of The Throwbacks!

-An acoustic ditty performed by Gavin Loudspeaker!